To Be or Not To Be a Writer

My father’s dream

To Be or Not To Be a Writer
I have always wanted to write something that would be published one day. But, I am very lazy to improve my skills. Since I am just doing tutorial and online jobs, I have enough time for my hobbies but sleeping is so tempting.
Online writer is very common nowad ays but the pay is very low. Last week, I saw an ad for online writers and of course the applicant should be at least university level. I called them to inquire about it and if they would accept a high school level. I told them that my father is very good at writing though he only finished high school. I gave them assurance that he has got the skills til I convinced them. The problem was, he is not a computer literate and has got zero knowledge in computer and internet. But, I told the manager that I can help him about it. I also told him that he had written many articles and interesting short stories when he was younger. The management gave me a chance and asked me to submit 3 recent articles so I sent my father a text message right away. I think he was confused what I was talking about and refused but I told him that his articles will be published online lol. He was innocent of what I was talking about but I am a stubborn child that I pout when he says No to my requests.
I was touched then when I read one of the articles he submitted. I realized that I am a ” copy” of him no wonder why we often fight lol. I always think that he is very smart and intelligent but didn’t realize that he sometimes feel inferior though I never saw it on his face.
Knowing how strict and superior  he is, I find his words here humble for admitting that his skills aren’t enough.
*******His dream to be a writer***********
Writing was a passion in my youth days. I have a repertory of interests in sports, adventures, politics, religion and other topics of human interests. This was gained through my travels and personal experiences. I used to spend hours in writing until my fingers felt a painful spasmodic cramps.
But it was only that, I wrote only as a way of expressing myself, nothing else. The pieces I wrote usually ended in the trash without even read by another person. There was no form in it as I have no formal training acquired from school. To enhance my skill, I studyJournalism and Story Writing through a correspondence school. Though it was a distant study, I felt I can acquire the tools for a good writer.
True enough, after 3 years of intermittent studies in Journalism, I tried my hand in writing. I was determined even though I have a tremendous handicap in my typing. My fingers were too shaky because as a martial arts practitioner, my hands were trained to hit heavy punching bags and other hard objects. This became a deficiency. But my determination at that time was so strong notwithstanding this setback. I wrote countless of articles which were submitted to various publications but none were accepted or even considered. Slowly, my enthusiasm for writing began to fade until it died. That was 20 years ago. I have resigned to the fact that my skill was not enough to be an accomplish writer.
Now, I received a joke. My daughter Sheryl phoned me to prepare myresume and to make 3 articles of any topic. And she wanted it fast. I don’t have any idea where she is going to submit it but it was as if she was certain I can do it. I was dumbed for a while because my first reaction was that, there’s no way I can ever do it. If I was not able to do it while I was still young and full of vigorous ideas, the more I can not do by now that I’m already 50 years of age. It is an obvious futile attempt for the second time. My long years of inactivity in this matter has compiled an enormous stack of rusts in my system. I likened myself to an engine that has been laid aside for a long time that the only remaining usage is to bring it to the junkyard for a scrap. My reply to my daughter was that 99.9 percent I can not do it. So I don’t want the pain of frustrations that I suffered 20 years ago to resurrect to a more degree of anguish than before. But she was persistent.
A long hours of soul searching and meditation lead me to a passage of the Holy Scriptures in Mt 13:31-32; the Parable of the MustardSeed. In that, I realized that God needs only .1 percent of my faith to succeed. I also marveled at my daughter’s faith on me and this was the deciding factor for me to shake off the rusts in my imaginations and try writing one more time.
Like an athlete who will always have the difficulty of getting back in shape after a long period of inactivity, I am also struggling in many aspects of what is to be a writer. My passion for writing is now about to resurrect and if given the chance, I vowed to write and write until my fingers and hands have the strength to do it and until my brain will receive the oxygen to fan my imaginations.

1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. RichSears
    Jul 24, 2012 @ 01:14:42

    Sheryl , Your already a writer, you just need to accept that you are, as our Heavenly Father Said…..AS A Man ( or woman; ) Thinketh is their heart, so are they, Your an Inspirational Writer, person & your very out going, Believe me i would love you to Write my life story, & you may love doing it as well, because it involves your country & people…..Just From Reading Your Blogs & story.., i’m a believer in You, & will assist you in every way that i can…to help you accomplish your dreams in life, do’nt let you age detour you from your dreams…, look @me june thee 17th i turned 61 years of age flat broke & living on gover’mental assistance with housing as well….but this year my plans are in order to Launch out into the Deep & Cast my Mustard Seeds out into the World, so i am giving My Dreams A chance to Blossom…With GODS Tender Loving Care Through JESUS And Together we can Empower Many Lives in your Country, if you just Believe & take actions with me….RichSears!!!


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